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Treasured Trash


Jesus Franco
Isn't it something how DVD helped usher in the new era of concern for image quality and filmic integrity while simultaneously glutting the b-movie market, including everything from European trash by the likes of Jesus Franco and Jean Rollin to thousands of other cult films such as Weasels Rip My Flesh? Never mind that the films are total crap, they're finally presented in their correct aspect ratio and fully uncut! Take Franco's A Virgin Among the Living Dead for example, which is only one of several titles the film is known by because there are several different versions of the film, and really what difference does it make since every version is still one of the worse films ever made. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of enjoyable bad films. But let's face it, dressing up a Jesus Franco film as a pristine digitally remastered DVD is like putting a freshly pressed tuxedo on a piss-stinking bum.



Skeletor in Bloody...
As for those enjoyable bad films, on my shelf at home is a bootleg of The Touch of Satan. The name may sound familiar to all of you Mystery Science Theater 3000 fans. It was episode number 908. For some reason I love this abysmal movie, but I prefer watching it without Mike Nelson, Tom Servo and Croooow on the bottom of the screen. They're great company and all, and that line "Well, hello, pile of dung" is classic, but The Touch of Satan is totally watchable without the touch of MST3K. I also have the Something Weird Video DVD of Bloody Pit of Horror, and I admit to being a little disappointed that they couldn't find a clean film element for the full first twenty or so minutes of the film, since the scene where one of the guys climbs the ivy to get into the mansion was cut out of the cleaner version. What a shame that Bloody Pit of Horror couldn't have gotten the full restoration treatment that, oh, say, Gone With the Wind was lavished with. I mean, Bloody... is totally the better movie, right?


(This was originally written, in a slightly different version, for FavoriteMedia on December 20, 2007).

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